- "Teacher, you look like Ed Sheeran!"
- "Teacher, I look like Justin Bieber!"
- Randomly during an exam (the word heist was not on the exam)
- Student: "Miss, what is a heist?"
- Me (panicking):"Uh, when someone successfully pulls off something difficult like stealing 5 million baht." *his eyes proceed to bulge out of his head*
- When writing a review of their favorite film:
- Gun (student): "Teacher I don't know the characters names."
- Me: "Gun, this is supposed to be your favorite movie. What do you mean you don't know the characters? You should pick another movie."
- Gun: "Ok teacher" *Writes a film review about a movie where he doesn't know any of the characters names and just uses pronouns, making it impossible to follow the plot*
- Student begins waving as my co-teacher and I enter the classroom
- Me: "Oh you must be happy we're here and to have English class!"
- Student: "No." *Panics upon realizing he just told me he's not happy to have class
- Before the classes lunch break
- Co-teacher: "Would you like your break? What's the magic word?"
- Student: "Goodbye teacher!" *They proceed to take a break
- Another student in a different class: "Release me!"
- I have twins in my grade who are not in the same class
- Me: "What is your nickname and what is your twin's nickname?"
- Twin 1: "My nickname is Win. My brother is Won."
- Me: *internally* Well that certainly is interesting and those are some very confident nicknames. I am now wondering if they chose those names themselves, since many Thai kids pick their own nicknames.
- Student comes into class hiding something under his shirt
- Me: "What do you have under there?"
- Student: "A cat." *pulls out a cat and lets the cat run loose in the room.
- They don't tell you what to do when a student brings a cat to class when you learn how to be a teacher
- I didn't have a lesson planned (just being honest), so we played Scattergories.
- Me: "Name an item of clothing that begins with the letter H."
- Student: "Horns!...Like a Viking!"
- Me: "I'll give it to you, I guess."
- Me: "Name an animal that begins with the letter G."
- Student: "Grandmother."
- Me: "Well, that's one answer, I guess."
- While playing charades
- Me: "What do you say when you want someone to marry you?"
- Student: "Where's my ring!"
- During an exam
- Student: "Teacher, what is diarrhea?"
- Me: *Trying not to laugh, but also think of an appropriate way to tell him "It's when you go to the bathroom and can't control it."
- Student sitting in the back of the room with an ENORMOUS grin
- Me: "What do you have in that water bottle?"
- Student: *Lifts up a water bottle "These are my shrimps and they are my new family."
- Me: *Looking at the live shrimp "Ok great. Just put them away during class. Are you going to eat them?"
- Student: "Only if they die."
So there you have it, some of the funny things my students have told me throughout the year!
